eyes on the back of my head

The Accuser. That's who the devil is. Now, I am a new creation through Christ Jesus. Sometimes I think it is too bad that my "old creation" memories don't get washed in the blood aswell.

I have a past. That past is full of people and things. I have confessed my past to my parents and I don't feel like I'm living dual lives anymore. But still, when I come across someone from my past memories begin to flood in.

I know that my past makes me who I am today and helps me make decisions to become who I will be in the future. However, some things just pain me to think about. Certain people remind me of such sinful things I thought and did. My dilemma: Am I overreacting or is it normal that I want to avoid these people at all costs?

Satan attacks constantly bringing up memories and it's hard to not dwell on the past. But in order to not bring up the memories I need to avoid contact with people that are a part of that. I know it's impossible, but I can try, right? And I don't have the heart to tell someone I don't want to talk to them anymore.

I'm not a mean person. I just get this feeling. It's like self-preservation. I just don't know. I need to continuously pray for discernment. I have to be able to discern what is coming from my flesh and what is the Holy Spirit's prompting.

All I know is that I can't fall for the Devil's tricks again. The battle begins in the mind and I intend to put up a fight. I won't allow my fleshly thoughts to continue. It is just too easy to fall back into what I was. I know who God wants me to be. I won't be who I was. I am new.